I know. Enough, already! You can expect my Shangri-la-dee-da posts to get progressively shorter, and I expect to resume “real” blogging soon.

This morning, I woke up spacey. I can’t walk from one room to the next without forgetting why I’m there.

I’m also jittery (yet I’m still drinking my morning coffee…gee, that’s smart) and grouchy. I’ve already crated the monster-beast dog Katie three times for her (normal) growly, food-protecting behavior. She’s setting me on edge, and I’m already working with a hair-trigger temper this morning. This is completely unacceptable.

Today, I will do sugar only, to see what — if any — immediate effect that has on my mood. I’m also starting to think about discontinuing coffee, but that’s a harder (and more emotional) call to make. There’s something about the ritual for me of pouring a few ounces of milk into a pint glass, then filling it with coffee…it’s my morning comfort.

This morning’s weight: 149.8 (26.5)

We’re heading out soon for a hike; it’s gloriously sunny and warm this morning, and we’ve started to settle into a typical Colorado spring pattern, complete with afternoon showers/storms. If I want to hike, now’s the time…besides that, I don’t have the mental focus available to work this morning at all. As I said, unacceptable.

The hike worked wonders — I felt human afterward. On the drive out of the park, I drank my pre-prepared sugar water, and the good feelings continued.

8am-10:30am coffee
11:15am: last food, hike
1:00pm: 3T sugar in 20oz water
2:15pm: lunch — again, wanted a much healthier selection than usual. I was also parked right in front of ColdStone, and I didn’t care. Ice cream is probably my BIGGEST temptation, and ColdStone (mmm…sweet cream with raspberries!) is the biggest temptation of all. I didn’t care. Oh, and I ordered tofu in my lunch. Tofu? What?
6:30pm: dinner, pretty light
9:00pm: 3T sugar in 20oz water

The mood change over the course of the day has been dramatic. I credit at least part of it (if not most) to the hike, compounded by good food choices. I do (vaguely, anyway) remember that about eating right “for my type” in years past. Once I got accustomed to eating well, food was like a drug (in a good sense).

The best way I can describe my reactions to oil and sugar is to compare them to depressed/anxiety-ridden me (oil) versus newly medicated me (sugar). Before Effexor, I was generally irritable all the time and physically felt tight — not sure what else to call it — in my head. Once I started the antidepressant, the tightness was gone (what a relief!), and I felt like a very good version of normal. You know, my appetite change was similar then, and I lost about 7-1/2 pounds during my first two weeks on meds. With the symptoms seeming so similar, I wonder what effect the sugar water has on brain chemistry?

That leads to the other observation for me today: Instead of eating, I’m feeding myself. This is much more active, and it’s more nurturing instead of frenzied.

We’ll see tomorrow if the improved mood from skipping oil in favor of sugar water continues.