Okay, folks…I did it. I uploaded a current photo and reset my match.com profile to active. YIKES.

Let the games begin!

Not that I’m into game-playing or anything.

Really. I wouldn’t consider it.

I used to be pretty good at the dating thing. It took me until perhaps around 26-28 before I started to figure out how to do it, though — how people actually meet and marry in their teens and early 20s is beyond me! The key is to write a profile that REALLY describes you. Sounds easy, right?

It’s not.

Until my early 30s (I’m nearly 34 now), I honestly had no idea how to simply be myself. What did “being myself” mean, anyway? When I first ventured into the world of online dating (April 1998), the profile I wrote got HUGE numbers of hits. Men emailed me ALL. THE. TIME. Of course they did! I wrote what the typical guy wanted to hear! I was sporty. I skydived. I was fearless. While I am all of those things (well, the skydiving’s been on an indefinite hiatus for years), there’s a lot more to me, and the things I *didn’t* write about, it turns out, were much more important.

• I’m fairly well educated…enough so that not just any guy is going to cut it…but also not enough that I could even remotely consider myself part of the Intelligista.
• Christianity is something that’s important to me, enough so that I don’t want to get into a serious relationship with someone who doesn’t feel the same way.
• That said, the “typical” Christian guy I’d meet at singles groups around here is usually waaaaaay too conservative for me.
• I’m culturally literate enough that I’d like to be involved with someone who’s the same way.
• I’ve learned that while I can be sporty — hiking, weight training, etc — I’m not a big sports fan. Someone who wants to spend every weekend in front of the tube watching football will annoy me.
• On the other hand, someone who wants to camp, hike, snowboard, ski, or otherwise get outside…I’m all over that.

The other thing that’s jumped out to me since having my daughter is that there’s a preconception out there about single moms. Honestly, before having Maya, I would have held the same one — that a single mom must *really* want to find a man to play daddy. She must be a little *more* desperate to meet someone than the childless single gal.

Nothing could be farther from the truth.

If anything, pre-baby, I was much more willing to meet up with anyone who looked like they *might* meet my criteria. After all, what’s the problem with lunch? A simple meet-up can tell you lots about a person beyond what you learn online — and if they’re not “it” you’ve only given up an hour. Besides, you have to eat, right?

Now, it’s a different ballgame. For me to even want to consider meeting up with someone, they’ve got to have a lot of potential. Now, I either have to meet them WITH baby (okay for now, but not something I want to expose Maya to as she gets older), or I have to make arrangements for a sitter. That’s a lot of work. For me to want to do that work, a guy’s got to be special.

Enough on dating for now…if any of you have comments on the match profile, by all means, leave comments. I’ll take them into consideration, then reserve the right to do something with them or not.

Happy Saturday, all!