Maya and I made a quick trip to BRU earlier. As usual, we encountered a pre-school-aged child who saw Maya and exclaimed, “Look! A baby!” This particular little girl was stunning, the daughter of a white AF officer (who was in uniform, holding her) dad and an Asian mom (obviously expecting child #2).

I commented on how pretty she was. The dad’s reply? “Oh, she’s a pain in the rear.” His tone wasn’t even joking.

What do you say to that? I just replied that mine was as sweet as she is cute and continued on my way, giving the little girl (who was maybe 3-4) a big smile.

Doesn’t this father realize that kids HEAR WHAT THEY SAY? I wanted to strangle him. That poor little girl very well could grow up with “I’m a pain” as part of her self-image. What a tragedy. Think, people!

Counterpoint

I turned on the TV this evening, and flipped to Nanny 911. The kids behaved horribly…and the parents didn’t offer any boundaries to the kids. At first, it was tough for the parents, because (of course) the kids rebelled big-time to their first encounter with boundaries. As the nanny’s time continued, the kids got the hang of having house rules and started to behave better. One of the emphases was to get buy-in from the oldest of the boys, so he could set an example for his younger brothers.

At the finale — a dinner party for the wife’s parents’ anniversary — the dad put his arm around his son and told him how proud he was of him, and how he’d stepped up to the plate to be an example for his brothers, and how impressed he was with him. The boy glowed, and I just about tearred up.

Yeah, that’s more like it. Give some boundaries…give some guidelines…but encourage the kids.

There’s a hard job in front of me…hope I’ll be up to it! Guess it’s a good thing I only have to learn one step at a time.